This page is for visitors to share stories of how drunk driving has affected their lives. Feel free to email me your story, and I will post it in the page. LLee1017@ctvea.net
Brad Smith
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Welcome, all visitors to this site – our friends old and new, and all of the newcomers to this story and its purpose!
A few months ago, barely before the weather started to get warm, my old friend Lance called me with an idea he had been kicking around in his head for a very long time apparently. He wanted my feedback as a friend, and once he explained his vision for a website I offered my services as a web/graphics designer immediately. After many years of struggle, he was finally ready to take on the task of putting an end to his doubts and fears and start living a more fulfilled life with a better sense of himself and what needed to be done. In the initial discussions, where we would meet weekly at my place, the ideas for this site began to form. The possibilities of what Lance wanted to create, what he wanted to do, and his renewed sense of purpose were showing quite a change in his entire demeanor – I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so focused and driven before. He told me his hope for this website and his desire as a man who has a difficult story that needs to be told, in a voice finally ready to tell it as it should be told; unvarnished and without reservation. I knew I had to be a part of this not only because I’m a good friend but also because I believe in him completely and what I know he will accomplish.
We had many ideas that got exchanged in many hours of conversation, and though I was committed from the beginning to seeing this happen and completely on board with him in every discussion, I have to be honest – our hours spent laboring over this site were not my favorite part of this journey, personally speaking. That has been great, and I take no credit for what happens when this site is launched for the public, because that is ALL about him, and I couldn’t be happier about that. My favorite part of this project has been getting sidetracked with him in conversations about each other, about our mutual friends, about love, about family, about politics, and laughing about the most ridiculous things imaginable. I say that because I love my friend, and because of the story I tell you now.
I’ve had an amazing opportunity working with Lance over the past several weeks giving this thing its substance, and in doing so I’ve come full circle with him in many ways. I’ve come to understand fundamentally what it means that I even HAVE the opportunity to sit with him in my home and have a conversation at all, having stood beside his hospital bed all those years ago after the accident not knowing what would become of him, worrying myself sick and sleepless about him, the agony he endured, and the life he would have to face – all because of one choice. Knowing how close I have been to not having an opportunity to have him as part of my life ensures that I cannot ever take him for granted. Knowing how committed he is to turning his hardships into someone else’s education is an amazing thing to bear witness to, and I am grateful he chose me to help him get this far. I will not lie, though, it’s been a very tough thing seeing the pictures and the videos, as I’m sure it will be for most of you. Seeing those things would be unbearable were it not for the fact that he didn’t give up, he didn’t stop, and here we are now today, launching this website and gearing up for speaking engagements and education! Make no mistake, this is ALL him, folks. All I did was open a few doors, he is the one who walked through them and built the rest of this house.
I consider myself incredibly lucky not only to have helped my friend see this labor of love come to fruition, but to have him as such a fundamental part of my extended family. I’m glad we chose each other as friends, and glad that from these past couple of months working to make this site a reality that hopefully many people will re-tell this story and put an end to so much unnecessary misery and tragedy. This was a long time coming and seeing him made so happy has been his own gift to me.
I could not love you more, little brother – and I couldn’t be more proud of you and for you. You are one of the most courageous people I have ever known and I’m constantly inspired by your bravery.
_________________________________________________________________
Craig Howard
Monday May 11, 2009
Lance and I grew up together. We went to K-5 together, played football together, spent time after school together in elementary. In junior high school, we both left Glenwood and both started going to South Girard. We played football together there and played the same positions. I still don’t know why he quit playing. I would have loved to have had another “possession” (code for slow and white) receiver at practice and games with me. I guess he wanted to chase the ladies. From there we ran into each other on occasion, but for the most part our lives were on the same track heading in different directions.
It’s funny how life works. You can take the same variable and come up with different outcomes every time. Although I share the same variables as Lance on that weekend in October 1993, my outcome was a little better. At 3am, I had made it safely home from a night of partying and was sound asleep. My parents had gone to the Tennessee-Alabama game, so my partying started on Friday night and didn’t end until I drove back home Sunday after partying with my friends downtown.
I remember getting a call from a friend that Lance had an accident and was in the hospital. I remember thinking it was probably being overblown and that it probably wasn’t as bad as people were making it out to be. Then the news that Lance was going to Atlanta came out. I remember it so vividly because I remember thinking it could have very well been me. I remember people going to see Lance on different occasions and I remember that I would always find something else to do. I wanted to reach out to him so bad, but I couldn’t, wouldn’t because I was still doing the very the very thing that almost took his life.
I didn’t want to face him. I remember seeing him at Dana Gentry’s wedding at First Baptist and leaving out the side door and not going to the reception because I saw Lance come in. I saw him from behind one time in Tuscaloosa going to the entrance gate and worked my way to the other side of some fans so he wouldn’t see me. I would guess that I drove legally drunk at least 200 times after Lance’s accident and that is possibly on the conservative side.
Why God chooses to protect some and not others is still hard for me to understand. All I know is that we need to take each life circumstance we face and use it to the glory of God. That is what makes Lance so special. I am sure he has had to face plenty of moments with questions for God, but he wants to use his situation for the Kingdom and I think that is awesome.
To Lance, I am truly sorry for turning my back on you. You obviously didn’t need me to make the miraculous recovery that you did, but I feel that if the shoe were on the other foot, you wouldn’t have turned your back on me. Your story has inspired me since I first read it several months ago. I remember being up late one night because I couldn’t sleep and stumbling across your story. I was paralyzed as I read it and inspired to see how much God had given you back when you chose to turn to Him. It encouraged me to keep turning to God to work through any storm I may face.
If you have turned your back on God please be inspired by Lance to come back now!
_________________________________________________________________
Deby
Tuesday May 12,2009
